Poets’ Corner – a couple of my “Lockdown” Favourites

Hello again everyone!

I think I mentioned that the idea of a “Poets’ Corner” was born out of my finding and reading some amusing poetry to a group of elderly ladies that my husband and I would normally transport every other Monday to their Tea Club in the Lions Club minibus.  When we went into lockdown, I vowed to phone these ladies each Monday to have a chat a read them some poems.   The one below is one of my favourites.

 

BRIGHTON NUDIST BEACH

 

They’re pouring into Brighton

From everywhere I hear

It isn’t for the candy floss

It isn’t for the pier.

They’ve brought their buckets and their spades

They’ve brought their flasks of tea

But they haven’t brought their bathers ‘cos

They’re into NUDITY!!

 

CHORUS

 

Mum’s all bare, Dad’s all bare

The kids are starkers too

Grandad thought he’d have a crafty streak

I didn’t think that he had got the barefaced cheek!

My old girl

Didn’t she look a peach

Wobblin’ down to the water

On Brighton Nudist Beach!

 

The Vicar doesn’t like it

Teacher is upset

Yours disgusted Tunbridge Wells

Has not recovered yet!

The beach has been more crowded since

I don’t remember when

And I hear the price of telescopes

Is going up again!

 

Johnny went out shrimping

With his little net

Up and down the water’s edge

He hadn’t caught one yet.

He pushed his net into the sea

His Dad went pale and limp

Johnny said “I’m sorry Dad

I thought it was a shrimp!”

 

So come on down to Brighton

Come and have a bash

Just down the road from London Town

You’ll be there in a flash.

Swim in the altogether with

The old folk and the nippers

You can stay here for a week

Or just be a day Stripper!

 

Author anon (sorry!)

 

 

 

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